Gary C.

I spent almost 25 years doing volunteer fire and ems. Plus a few years a full time EMT on Mobil intensive care ambulances. I saw a lot of death and critical injuries from newborns to the elderly and all the ages in between. I did what I was supposed to do, keep it inside, show no emotions, ignore the nightmares. The drinking came easy as a way to cope. It got worse and worse as the years went on. I was not a good husband or father, I couldn’t even cry for my grandmothers funeral and I loved her so much. I knew something was wrong but would never disrespect our service men and women by thinking it was PTSD. I did not think my struggle was anywhere near what those heroes had to face. Finally an old friend who was a soldier opened my eyes, I did have PTSD and it was destroying me. It took a few more years to work through therapy and support sessions and many anxiety attacks but I am now 39 months sober and enjoying being a grandfather. The demons still exist but now they are the things I ignore.