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"Don't worry about those who talk behind your back..."

Posted on 28 August 2019

If there is one thing I know...it’s that success breeds haters and as I’ve said before...haters speak louder than lovers. They will scream your failures, but whisper your successes. I’ve been having my fair share of those types lately and many of them are what I like to call keyboard warriors. Slandering your name from afar behind the safety of a phone or a computer. Well, my initial response used to be to play alpha and lash back out. Although my emotions still get the best of me sometimes, I’m starting to learn a few things to keep my fuse in check. These people aren’t worth your time as they are actually below you and for some...if you thought they were a friend...they actually never were. For example... ask yourself this. Have you ever met a hater who is doing better than you? I’m sure you’ll find the answer to be a resounding no. So why the hate and why do we care? Well, the truth is...haters don’t really hate you. They actually hate themselves because you are everything they wish they were. That makes you an easy target for releasing someone’s anger. How many times have you taken your anger over a situation on another unrelated person? We all have and this is no different. By putting you down and dismissing your successes, they are building themselves up. If you aren’t so great, then they aren’t so bad. Since most people aren’t willing to exert the effort required to get the best things in life, they have to believe that you were the recipient of a blessing. Average people will hate you because they think you are lucky. Your improvement may bother people who are used to you existing below their level. They may openly campaign for you to get your life together, but they secretly relish their superiority over you. If you spend most of your time around people who care about you, you won’t have this issue. Close friends and family genuinely want you to succeed. However, even some of your closest friends will not because change disrupts the social order they rely on for their self-esteem. They will also feel abandoned. Even though you acted in your best interest and became a better person, all they can see is that you’re now a traitor. They will constantly try and remind you where you came from in an effort to pull you back down to their level. So the point is, it doesn’t matter what you do or how well you do it, there will always be someone who finds fault in it. Criticism and negativity from difficult people are like a wall and if you focus on it, then you’ll run right into it. You’ll get blocked by negative emotions, anger, and self-doubt. Your mind will go where your attention is focused. Criticism and negativity don’t prevent you from reaching the finish line, but they can certainly distract you from it. However, if you focus on the road in front of you and on moving forward, then you can safely speed past the walls and barriers that are nearby. Now go say hello and thank your biggest fans. Trust me...they are watching!

~Paul Phillips

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