I'm a cop, a dad, a brother, and a son. Life was eating me apart day after day. The horror of things I witnessed at work was killing me. Trying to keep things normal at home with my wife and young daughter was nearly impossible. So, I drank. A lot. Instead of being there for my family, I went out to a bar and zoned out. Escaped from all of it. Poured myself home every night. I had no idea what it was doing to my family. I had no idea what it was doing to me either. I didn't care. I was killing myself every day.
Eventually, I lost my family, Divorce. My wife said she couldn't take it anymore. I don't blame her. She took a lot with her when she left, including my daughter.
I found myself at bars. Alone. Drinking with old, fat dudes that actually think the hot bartender is interested in them. I was quickly becoming one of them. I remember sitting at one particular bar looking around at all the dudes just like me. I became disgusted at what I had become. It was at that very moment that I realized I had a choice to make. I could sit there every day and drink myself silly for the rest of my days, or I could get my shit together and be a man that my sweet daughter could look up to. I got to work. I told everyone in my drinking circle that I was done with that life. It didn't go over well. To this day, I don't talk to any of the people I used to drink with. I became the enemy. They were offended that I didn't want to drink with them anymore. So, I became isolated. It was just me. No drinking buddies and my family was gone. What to do? Improve. Every fucking day. Handle your shit. Face everything head on. That's what I do.
Almost 3 years have passed. I Lost 30 pounds. I Compete in cross-fit. I Exercise every day. I read. I take classes on-line.
I now have people asking me how I do it and can I help them. My answer: Of course I can help, but this life is on you. You have to do it all.
Nobody is coming to rescue you.
So, I saw the ad for Demons behind me on FB. It came at the right time. I ordered a shirt and hat. When I wear them, people ask about it. I tell them my story with absolute pride and zero fucking shame. I was a drunk. I'm not anymore. That demon is behind me and so is the past........Every once in a while I look back. I see the demon and I give him the middle finger.