I found the Demons Behind Me adds on Facebook not long ago and began following you.
I've read a few of the personal accounts and stories. I love the products and what they represent to those of us that have struggled with and are recovering from addiction.
I myself struggled with high functioning alcoholism for many years.
Today marks 1002 days since my last drink!!
Unlike many of those with addiction, I blame absolutely no one but myself.
I could blame my upbringing. I could blame my parents drinking. I could blame abuse.
I blame me.....
No one makes anyone drink. No one poured the booze down my throat. I bought the booze, I drank the booze, and I hid the booze for years.
I told my wife and kids more times than I can remember that I was going to quit drinking. And each time I would go back to the bottle again.
The last day that I drank I woke up not knowing how I got in bed or how much I had consumed the night before.
This was the last of many of these same scenarios.
I got out of bed at 5:00 that morning and went to the couch after looking at the bottle of wine, 16 empty beer cans, and the half empty bottle of whiskey that my wife put on the counter for me to see.
I sat there on the couch devastated. I sat there remembering all the broken promises I had made. I sat there wondering why I still had my wife and my family.
I broke down in tears and sobbed until my wife came out to talk to me.
On that day, she had planned to kick me out because she had had all she could take.
Before she had the chance to speak that morning, I broke down, and for the first time in a very long time, I had wholehearted regret for my actions. I gave a wholehearted apology. I gave a wholehearted promise that I was done drinking !
For whatever reason, my wife believed me !
She didn't mention the intention of kicking me out that day for quite some time.
We had a long few days of detox after that. Day 5 was the worst day I can ever remember in my life.
After that, the recovery has been easy for me. I have done it on my own for the most. No meetings. No medications. Just will power an the mind over matter philosophy.
Every day, I just tell myself I am not going to drink. Every day, I tell myself I am going to be a better father, husband, and man than I was yesterday.
It's been over 1000 days, and I still think about drinking every day, but I haven't, and I don't plan to again.
Thank you for your company!
Thank you for the support for those of us fighting every day!