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Demons Behind Me Safe House | Personal Stories - Raw & Unedited


by James Thelen 09 Nov 2023 0 Comments

I think that it’s important to realize that, for some people, their demons are always trailing them. I almost ended my life on June 16, 2017. I was 5’5” and 93 lbs when I got to the hospital. I was eating once every three days, never leaving bed, and keeping my phone off. I was prescribed medication and my therapy got upped to twice a week. This was the darkest point in my life and it felt like it was never going to end. I didn’t have an amazing support system. I pretty much only had my best friend and I hid from her how much I was struggling. She was the one that called my parents to bring me to the hospital and kept me from trying again that night. Once I was out of the hospital, she broke down and apologized over and over again for not noticing. That was one of the handful of times that I had ever seen her cry. After a few tries, the medications started working. In August 2017, I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder, General Amxiety Disorder, and Type II Bipolar disorder. While getting those diagnoses was a slap in the face, it made everything make sense. It also made it easier for me to manage my emotions since I knew what the problem was. Fast forward to today: I’ve been in and out of therapy since August 2015, on medication since June 2017, and I’m finally learning how to deal with everything in my head. I moved across the country, married the most amazing woman, and enjoy every moment with her and our tiny Rottweiler. Despite everything good I have going, there are still plenty of days that I wake up and wish that I could just check out of life for a month. So yes, my demons are behind me, but sometimes they’re not very far. Everyday is some sort of battle, but it’s absolutely worth pushing on.

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